sugarvalves [1963573] —
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The city of Ciudad Juarez has been declared safe for Torn citizens to return after 36-hours of violence finally came to an end. Hundreds were left consigned to hospital during this period of instability, with JFA, JFA 2.0 and the wider JFA family later claiming responsibility for the outbreak of hostilities. However, with just seven JFA members present in Mexico at the time of writing, the threat of injury now seems to have surpassed.
Forewarning of the events in Ciudad Juarez came via a forum post by Taco_Klitoris (a.k.a. Kapten_Klitoris), in which he advised Torn citizens to avoid travelling there due to the presence of a looming yet unspecified threat. At first, Senor Klitoris spoke as if he and his faction had no involvement in this brutal episode; and in lieu of an official statement, the public began to speculate wildly as to what was going on down in Murder City.
Rumours of a dirty bomb or a zombie outbreak were soon quashed though, as it became clear that significant numbers of JFA affilliated fighters had arrived in Mexico to stir up trouble. Innocent people were beaten, shops were looted, and a small chihuahua was mildly startled during the fracas. And with JFA's constant hospitalising of anyone seen roaming the streets, this meant that there was no escape for their victims.
The border to Torn was effectively but not officially closed in one direction. Many unlucky souls found themselves trapped on flights to Mexico knowing full well the fate which awaited them. One man tried to force the aviation authorities to grant him passage back to Torn by eating every packet of peanuts on the flight in an attempt to trigger a nonexistent nut allergy and earn compassionate repatriation. He awoke in a Mexican hospital twelve hours later being beaten about the groin with a baseball bat. He was charged $489 for the nuts.
Those who stepped off the plane in Ciudad Juarez willingly soon found themselves caught up in a maelstrom of wanton savagery. Innocent plushy importers and tourists were battered and bruised, soon to be joined by curious rubberneckers who couldn't help but make the short leap across the border to find out what was going on. What they encountered was a collection of JFA, JFA 2.0, JFB and JFC members raising terrible hell, with JFB members reportedly comprising one-third of participants during the event's first few hours.
At the height of the conflict, Ciudad Juarez Hospital saw hundreds of patients pass through its doors. Medical supplies became extremely limited as a result, and one man was seen leaving the facility with his shrapnel wounds bandaged in what looked suspiciously like corn flour tortillas. Revives were difficult to come by and highly priced. The lucky ones had faction-mates and spouses fly over to help revive them, only for many of these to end up being assaulted and detained themselves.
[Pictured: Mexican First Aid Kit]
Some factions were even forced to travel across the border to rescue members left trapped in Mexico by JFA's surprise attack. Hacienda were one such faction, performing a heroic A-Team style extraction exercise in order to save a stricken Daddy1013 from further harm. Others decided to help in their own special way by adding more violence into the mix, with Subversive Alliance represented by several members including former leader Midknight and professional stool-stirrer Dekloren - the latter describing the event as "nothing too exciting."
With the prospect of inter-faction violence added to the mix, only Torn's most ignorant or inquisitive made an appearance in Ciudad Juarez over the following day and a half. Reports suggest the violence had mostly subsided by the small hours of August 21st, and when this reporter flew to Mexico on an all-expenses-paid trip - escorts and tequila aside - I saw only a handful of people still languishing in hospital and just seven members of JFA present in the country.
JFA were officially identified as being the perpetrators of the Mexican incident by helper HavokGDI, who described the faction as a "terrorist organisation" in his public-service forum post. Taco_Klitoris confirmed his own involvement a few hours after his original post when he reported that "100 People in Mexico [were] active in [the] past 24 hours, [it] was about 40 when we started."
JFA member TrAsH_FiSh later clarified that the invasion of Mexico was a pre-planned operation meant to last 24 hours, but which was extended to 36 due to an unscheduled early assault by their peachy keen members. TrAsH_FiSh blamed the victims for their failure to heed the warnings of Taco_Klitoris, and when I spoke to him earlier today he elaborated on yesterday's tragic events.
"All I can really tell you about the event was it was well organized fun and the second time this type of thing has been done. My role in it was simply that of having fun and hosping as many people that flew to Mexico."
JFA 2.0 leader Mug expanded on this sentiment and revealed that it was Taco_Klitoris who single-handedly organised the assault on Ciudad Juarez, rather than himself or his counterpart Stretch in JFA.
"Kapten_klitoris did a good job getting people into the spirit of the event a bunch getting everyone to change honor bars, make their names more spanish like, mexican related profile pictures. Speaking spanish all day in faction chat and travel chat. and getting people wearing banada's tanktops AK-47's and baseball bats to top off the hype."
The image above was accompanied by a loadout specification which required participants to sport a bandana, tank top, hiking boots, AK-47, pistol, baseball bat and be living in a trailer. This request was followed by the comment "If we could have used tequila as a temporary weapon, we would." I spoke to Taco / Kapten Klitoris earlier this evening, and when I asked him why he undertook this operation he told me that it had no purpose other than being for the fun and betterment of his faction, particularly those who were new to the JFA ranks.
"I arranged this mainly for our new playerbase at JFA 2.0, to show then Torn isn't all about eating Xanax and hitting the gym. And invited other friendly factions aswell including JFA and JFB...Some of them made a lot of money...I just asked in chat and five guys started to talk spanish."
"I started planning this last Monday, and the event was going for all Sunday. Torn needs a bit more of metagaming, and this is just a small casual event that everyone can attend...Mexico was a big f**king mess, and it was hilarious...walking around the Mexican hospital to taste all the salty tears."
As various members of JFA have alluded, this is the second time a nation has been blockaded by the members of one faction, with Toronto, Canada being the target of a similar operation many years prior. Mug told me that this too was the work of Taco_Klitoris - something Taco later admitted - and a series of anonymous mails I have received seems to indicate that Taco / Kapten is planning a third attack on another nation soon.
Mug confirmed this possibility with the following statement:
"I mean anything is possible you have Kapten_Klitoris whose a JFA organizing it and we sure do love being *******s any day of the week."
Senor Klitoris admitted a third attack was on his to-do-list, but that nothing would be happening for some time yet.
"I might arrange something again, but not for a while since this went a big bigger than I expected...a lot bigger. Next time be prepared to be shot down in Swiss by the ski patrol and some sexy nurses ;)"
If a foreign assault is forthcoming, watch out for JFA members arming themselves with Swiss Army Knives, the Swiss Army SG 500 and Hiking Boots as a sign that preparations are well underway - especially if these things are paid for with stolen Nazi gold or holey cheese. Also, a JFA insider tells me that anyone with a Mexican flag or travel honor bar was less likely to be hospitalised, so anyone hoping for immunity during a future conflict in Zurich would do well to remember this handy little hint.
But what are the ramifications of this and future assaults on foreign shores? The Ciudad Juarez event was reported to have raised the prices of certain imported items due to the disrupted supply chain, but one wonders what would happen if such an incident does indeed occur in Switzerland, or another coveted location such as the Caymans?
JFA's invasion was bad enough, but at least their motivations were pure. If a stronger, more numerous faction decided to invade these important regions they may have a more dastardly plan in mind. With enough strong players on rotation, a faction could easily charge people for the privilege of attending rehab or depositing their cash without being attacked. And as has been evidenced by their lack of intervention so far, there is little or nothing the Torn authorities could or would be willing to do in such a situation.
If Subversive Alliance takes Zurich, who will be her liberators? Should Destructive Anomaly decide to send their ranks to George Town, will anyone fight for its freedom? Where is the Torn Army while all of this is happening? Our city's military has not once been called upon to intervene in a faction conflict, but when the smackheads can't go to rehab and the financiers lose access to their funds, will Torn's troops finally see action?
Let's hope so. Because despite Taco_Klitoris insisting otherwise, in the same breath he seems to indicate that JFA's troops are already preparing for their next invasion. And if Switzerland truly is JFA's next destination, Torn City's junkies would be well advised to get their rehab stint in as early as possible.
Forewarning of the events in Ciudad Juarez came via a forum post by Taco_Klitoris (a.k.a. Kapten_Klitoris), in which he advised Torn citizens to avoid travelling there due to the presence of a looming yet unspecified threat. At first, Senor Klitoris spoke as if he and his faction had no involvement in this brutal episode; and in lieu of an official statement, the public began to speculate wildly as to what was going on down in Murder City.
Rumours of a dirty bomb or a zombie outbreak were soon quashed though, as it became clear that significant numbers of JFA affilliated fighters had arrived in Mexico to stir up trouble. Innocent people were beaten, shops were looted, and a small chihuahua was mildly startled during the fracas. And with JFA's constant hospitalising of anyone seen roaming the streets, this meant that there was no escape for their victims.
The border to Torn was effectively but not officially closed in one direction. Many unlucky souls found themselves trapped on flights to Mexico knowing full well the fate which awaited them. One man tried to force the aviation authorities to grant him passage back to Torn by eating every packet of peanuts on the flight in an attempt to trigger a nonexistent nut allergy and earn compassionate repatriation. He awoke in a Mexican hospital twelve hours later being beaten about the groin with a baseball bat. He was charged $489 for the nuts.
Those who stepped off the plane in Ciudad Juarez willingly soon found themselves caught up in a maelstrom of wanton savagery. Innocent plushy importers and tourists were battered and bruised, soon to be joined by curious rubberneckers who couldn't help but make the short leap across the border to find out what was going on. What they encountered was a collection of JFA, JFA 2.0, JFB and JFC members raising terrible hell, with JFB members reportedly comprising one-third of participants during the event's first few hours.
At the height of the conflict, Ciudad Juarez Hospital saw hundreds of patients pass through its doors. Medical supplies became extremely limited as a result, and one man was seen leaving the facility with his shrapnel wounds bandaged in what looked suspiciously like corn flour tortillas. Revives were difficult to come by and highly priced. The lucky ones had faction-mates and spouses fly over to help revive them, only for many of these to end up being assaulted and detained themselves.
[Pictured: Mexican First Aid Kit]
Some factions were even forced to travel across the border to rescue members left trapped in Mexico by JFA's surprise attack. Hacienda were one such faction, performing a heroic A-Team style extraction exercise in order to save a stricken Daddy1013 from further harm. Others decided to help in their own special way by adding more violence into the mix, with Subversive Alliance represented by several members including former leader Midknight and professional stool-stirrer Dekloren - the latter describing the event as "nothing too exciting."
With the prospect of inter-faction violence added to the mix, only Torn's most ignorant or inquisitive made an appearance in Ciudad Juarez over the following day and a half. Reports suggest the violence had mostly subsided by the small hours of August 21st, and when this reporter flew to Mexico on an all-expenses-paid trip - escorts and tequila aside - I saw only a handful of people still languishing in hospital and just seven members of JFA present in the country.
JFA were officially identified as being the perpetrators of the Mexican incident by helper HavokGDI, who described the faction as a "terrorist organisation" in his public-service forum post. Taco_Klitoris confirmed his own involvement a few hours after his original post when he reported that "100 People in Mexico [were] active in [the] past 24 hours, [it] was about 40 when we started."
JFA member TrAsH_FiSh later clarified that the invasion of Mexico was a pre-planned operation meant to last 24 hours, but which was extended to 36 due to an unscheduled early assault by their peachy keen members. TrAsH_FiSh blamed the victims for their failure to heed the warnings of Taco_Klitoris, and when I spoke to him earlier today he elaborated on yesterday's tragic events.
"All I can really tell you about the event was it was well organized fun and the second time this type of thing has been done. My role in it was simply that of having fun and hosping as many people that flew to Mexico."
JFA 2.0 leader Mug expanded on this sentiment and revealed that it was Taco_Klitoris who single-handedly organised the assault on Ciudad Juarez, rather than himself or his counterpart Stretch in JFA.
"Kapten_klitoris did a good job getting people into the spirit of the event a bunch getting everyone to change honor bars, make their names more spanish like, mexican related profile pictures. Speaking spanish all day in faction chat and travel chat. and getting people wearing banada's tanktops AK-47's and baseball bats to top off the hype."
The image above was accompanied by a loadout specification which required participants to sport a bandana, tank top, hiking boots, AK-47, pistol, baseball bat and be living in a trailer. This request was followed by the comment "If we could have used tequila as a temporary weapon, we would." I spoke to Taco / Kapten Klitoris earlier this evening, and when I asked him why he undertook this operation he told me that it had no purpose other than being for the fun and betterment of his faction, particularly those who were new to the JFA ranks.
"I arranged this mainly for our new playerbase at JFA 2.0, to show then Torn isn't all about eating Xanax and hitting the gym. And invited other friendly factions aswell including JFA and JFB...Some of them made a lot of money...I just asked in chat and five guys started to talk spanish."
"I started planning this last Monday, and the event was going for all Sunday. Torn needs a bit more of metagaming, and this is just a small casual event that everyone can attend...Mexico was a big f**king mess, and it was hilarious...walking around the Mexican hospital to taste all the salty tears."
As various members of JFA have alluded, this is the second time a nation has been blockaded by the members of one faction, with Toronto, Canada being the target of a similar operation many years prior. Mug told me that this too was the work of Taco_Klitoris - something Taco later admitted - and a series of anonymous mails I have received seems to indicate that Taco / Kapten is planning a third attack on another nation soon.
Mug confirmed this possibility with the following statement:
"I mean anything is possible you have Kapten_Klitoris whose a JFA organizing it and we sure do love being *******s any day of the week."
Senor Klitoris admitted a third attack was on his to-do-list, but that nothing would be happening for some time yet.
"I might arrange something again, but not for a while since this went a big bigger than I expected...a lot bigger. Next time be prepared to be shot down in Swiss by the ski patrol and some sexy nurses ;)"
If a foreign assault is forthcoming, watch out for JFA members arming themselves with Swiss Army Knives, the Swiss Army SG 500 and Hiking Boots as a sign that preparations are well underway - especially if these things are paid for with stolen Nazi gold or holey cheese. Also, a JFA insider tells me that anyone with a Mexican flag or travel honor bar was less likely to be hospitalised, so anyone hoping for immunity during a future conflict in Zurich would do well to remember this handy little hint.
But what are the ramifications of this and future assaults on foreign shores? The Ciudad Juarez event was reported to have raised the prices of certain imported items due to the disrupted supply chain, but one wonders what would happen if such an incident does indeed occur in Switzerland, or another coveted location such as the Caymans?
JFA's invasion was bad enough, but at least their motivations were pure. If a stronger, more numerous faction decided to invade these important regions they may have a more dastardly plan in mind. With enough strong players on rotation, a faction could easily charge people for the privilege of attending rehab or depositing their cash without being attacked. And as has been evidenced by their lack of intervention so far, there is little or nothing the Torn authorities could or would be willing to do in such a situation.
If Subversive Alliance takes Zurich, who will be her liberators? Should Destructive Anomaly decide to send their ranks to George Town, will anyone fight for its freedom? Where is the Torn Army while all of this is happening? Our city's military has not once been called upon to intervene in a faction conflict, but when the smackheads can't go to rehab and the financiers lose access to their funds, will Torn's troops finally see action?
Let's hope so. Because despite Taco_Klitoris insisting otherwise, in the same breath he seems to indicate that JFA's troops are already preparing for their next invasion. And if Switzerland truly is JFA's next destination, Torn City's junkies would be well advised to get their rehab stint in as early as possible.
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