ArttiIsGod [1954421] —
Original article
Hello and welcome to Torn City Crossword Nr. Five. How are you? You look nice. Have you had your hair done?
With small talk out of the way, let's take a quick look at last week's contest. Only 19 participants managed to submit the correct answer by Friday, perhaps because our fourth crossword was the most difficult yet - who knows. The answer we were looking for was 'Mom I cant pause this online game', and the first person to answer correctly was AlexeaNikkole, who will receive a Donator Pack for her efforts. AlexeaNikkole has been runner-up in two of our four crosswords thus far, and her consistent brilliance will only serve to inspire me to make these puzzles even more fiendishly difficult in future.
The runners-up were, in order of bone density, kunagisa, drcalypso and 8_Ball, who will each receive an Antitank for their troubles. Congratulations to the winners! Awards will be distributed in 24 hours! Here is last week's completed puzzle.

Moving on to this week's puzzle, as ever it consists of a crossword which can be solved using the clues provided. Once this has been achieved, a word(s) will be formed out of the letters which appear in the blue boxes. This word(s) must be sent to ArttiIsGod in the body of the mail - a change to the usual procedure because this week's answer is too darn long.
The first person to provide the correct answer will win a Donator Pack. Three runners-up will be chosen at random out of all correct responses to receive a Feathery Hotel Coupon. Furthermore, we will also hand out an FHC for the most eye-pleasing or interestingly solved crossword - perhaps you'll complete it in pink biro, or you'll use the blood of a freshly slaughtered hog, it's entirely up to you.
The competition will run until 23:59 pm Friday 4th of May, or the end of all things, whichever is sooner.
Happy solving!

LARGER VERSION
Clues!
ACROSS
1. The yellow rifle
2. Burning cocktail
4. Merits needed for the last merit upgrade
6. Presidential Mask
8. Bounty expiring time
9. Filled via rehab
11. Forrest Gump related honor
14. Holds gas
18. Single best default happiness booster in the game
22. Creator of TornStats
23. A rank trigger
28. Reef exploring goggles
35. Entitles free banner advertisement in the local newspaper
36. Direction of the Africa
37. Can be placed in the newspaper
38. A body part you can protect with armor
40. A job where only females are allowed to work
41. A simple yet slightly unnerving track
43. Attack setting
44. Mission difficulty
45. Having private island with a yacht
47. Director of the travel agency
55. Drug used by drug free users
57. Director of Torn City Media Productions
60. Your mom on 50 ecstasy
61. Not for eating; useful to reduce targets happiness
62. Pornographic stock
64. China's favorite national flower
67. Popular one-time use item
68. Porcine pottery vessel to store money
69. Company with virus coding reduction passive
DOWN
3. Type of mugger in Torn City
5. Found in a donator pack
7. Group crime
10. Starting level
12. Amount of times one has to travel to join mile high club
13. Status needed to have maximum energy bar 150
15. Interval time when Torn resets
16. Evil-Duck's favorite word
17. Gives 5-20 happy as long as your happy is 20% below maximum
19. Drink provided when using WLT
20. Something that skateboard increases
21. Bullet with increased accuracy
24. Type of crime
25. Country where you are allowed to buy ecstasy
26. A place where people keep money safe
27. Torn is marathon not a...
29. Vegetable after playing 1000 hours
30. The body part where Russian Roulette players will shoot
31. A most deceptive crime
32. Space guy mask
33. Crime experience
34. This cable can connect two devices together
39. Education course that will provide passive bonus to defense
42. Massive barrier; place for another brick
46. Ciudad Juarez
48. TCN Reporter
49. Education bachelor
50. Booster which provides a massive bonus to dexterity
51. Our loanshark's first name
52. Helmet that can protect you from some temporary weapons
53. They boost speed gains by 5% passively
54. Real Money Trading
56. Our resident Zeus
58. A place to put drugs
59. Duke's ex-girlfriend
63. Feminine melee weapon
65. Improves success rate for the transport drugs crime
66. A small; lightweight tool used in the building industry
With small talk out of the way, let's take a quick look at last week's contest. Only 19 participants managed to submit the correct answer by Friday, perhaps because our fourth crossword was the most difficult yet - who knows. The answer we were looking for was 'Mom I cant pause this online game', and the first person to answer correctly was AlexeaNikkole, who will receive a Donator Pack for her efforts. AlexeaNikkole has been runner-up in two of our four crosswords thus far, and her consistent brilliance will only serve to inspire me to make these puzzles even more fiendishly difficult in future.
The runners-up were, in order of bone density, kunagisa, drcalypso and 8_Ball, who will each receive an Antitank for their troubles. Congratulations to the winners! Awards will be distributed in 24 hours! Here is last week's completed puzzle.

Moving on to this week's puzzle, as ever it consists of a crossword which can be solved using the clues provided. Once this has been achieved, a word(s) will be formed out of the letters which appear in the blue boxes. This word(s) must be sent to ArttiIsGod in the body of the mail - a change to the usual procedure because this week's answer is too darn long.
The first person to provide the correct answer will win a Donator Pack. Three runners-up will be chosen at random out of all correct responses to receive a Feathery Hotel Coupon. Furthermore, we will also hand out an FHC for the most eye-pleasing or interestingly solved crossword - perhaps you'll complete it in pink biro, or you'll use the blood of a freshly slaughtered hog, it's entirely up to you.
The competition will run until 23:59 pm Friday 4th of May, or the end of all things, whichever is sooner.
Happy solving!

LARGER VERSION
Clues!
ACROSS
1. The yellow rifle
2. Burning cocktail
4. Merits needed for the last merit upgrade
6. Presidential Mask
8. Bounty expiring time
9. Filled via rehab
11. Forrest Gump related honor
14. Holds gas
18. Single best default happiness booster in the game
22. Creator of TornStats
23. A rank trigger
28. Reef exploring goggles
35. Entitles free banner advertisement in the local newspaper
36. Direction of the Africa
37. Can be placed in the newspaper
38. A body part you can protect with armor
40. A job where only females are allowed to work
41. A simple yet slightly unnerving track
43. Attack setting
44. Mission difficulty
45. Having private island with a yacht
47. Director of the travel agency
55. Drug used by drug free users
57. Director of Torn City Media Productions
60. Your mom on 50 ecstasy
61. Not for eating; useful to reduce targets happiness
62. Pornographic stock
64. China's favorite national flower
67. Popular one-time use item
68. Porcine pottery vessel to store money
69. Company with virus coding reduction passive
DOWN
3. Type of mugger in Torn City
5. Found in a donator pack
7. Group crime
10. Starting level
12. Amount of times one has to travel to join mile high club
13. Status needed to have maximum energy bar 150
15. Interval time when Torn resets
16. Evil-Duck's favorite word
17. Gives 5-20 happy as long as your happy is 20% below maximum
19. Drink provided when using WLT
20. Something that skateboard increases
21. Bullet with increased accuracy
24. Type of crime
25. Country where you are allowed to buy ecstasy
26. A place where people keep money safe
27. Torn is marathon not a...
29. Vegetable after playing 1000 hours
30. The body part where Russian Roulette players will shoot
31. A most deceptive crime
32. Space guy mask
33. Crime experience
34. This cable can connect two devices together
39. Education course that will provide passive bonus to defense
42. Massive barrier; place for another brick
46. Ciudad Juarez
48. TCN Reporter
49. Education bachelor
50. Booster which provides a massive bonus to dexterity
51. Our loanshark's first name
52. Helmet that can protect you from some temporary weapons
53. They boost speed gains by 5% passively
54. Real Money Trading
56. Our resident Zeus
58. A place to put drugs
59. Duke's ex-girlfriend
63. Feminine melee weapon
65. Improves success rate for the transport drugs crime
66. A small; lightweight tool used in the building industry
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