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Under pressure to acquire new artefacts and exhibits, the Torn City Museum will temporarily increase its payouts in celebration of International Museum Day.
Torn Museum is set to offer a bonus payout of points to those who donate items in a bid to increase the diversity of their exhibitions. This temporary measure comes after minutes of speculation over the Museum's future, with Torn citizens said to give "less than a tenth of a shit" about our city's sole cultural institution.
For years the Torn Museum has led the way in its acquisition of foreign items, with our people more than happy to bring back a few 'holiday souvenirs' in exchange for points. This practice made the Museum the envy of even the world's greatest cultural thieves, The British Museum, with Torn's curators providing tips to their British counterparts on how to correctly smuggle medieval coins about one's person.
Sadly, due to the increasing laziness of Torn's people, the Museum's collection has now dwindled to a mere trickle. So, in an attempt to combat this, item donators will receive 10% more points than they typically would for the duration of World Museum Day on May 18th, with this feature part of a two-pronged approach aimed at boosting the Museum's flagging popularity.
Pictured: A place less popular than the local brothel, race track or city dump.
On Friday, those who provide the museum with an Egyptian Amulet that definitely wasn't stolen while on holiday in Egypt stand to receive 1,000 more points than usual, with this increase equating to around $53,000,000 in Torn City Dollars. Likewise, donators who somehow acquire a set of Quran scripts - presumably through the performance of some sort of cultural hate crime - will take home 100 extra points, which works out at $5,300,000 extra in your pocket.
While the gains for a plushie set or exotic flower collection may be paltry, those in possession of high-value rare items stand to make a large sum of money from this promotional venture, as do those who purchase said items from people who haven't yet read the newspaper.
Pictured: The smug face of a man who just purchased 400 Ganesha sculptures off the item market.
The second promotional campaign being run by the museum consists of a soon-to-be-announced competition called The Exhibitionists. This contest, which will run for a week from Friday 18th, invites the public to generate their own potential museum collections from the everyday items available in Torn City. For example, a compass, sextant, naval cutlass and peg leg could be used to form a maritime exhibit. Alternatively, the leather bullwhip, deputy star, gold nugget and leather trousers may form some kind of wild west attraction.
Entrants are encouraged to be creative in their efforts and make links that are amusing, surprising, clever or a combination of all three. Exhibit ideas both historical and contemporary will be accepted, with entries limited to one per person and a maximum of five individual items. The top three entries as judged by Duke will go on to receive the traditional ribbons and point awards, as well as some special historical prizes yet to be announced.
In the meantime, Torn's people are encouraged to purchase or acquire as many historical artefacts as their arms and cavities can possibly hold, for come Friday the 18th, the price of said items is sure to skyrocket like some sort of rocket flying into the sky.
For years the Torn Museum has led the way in its acquisition of foreign items, with our people more than happy to bring back a few 'holiday souvenirs' in exchange for points. This practice made the Museum the envy of even the world's greatest cultural thieves, The British Museum, with Torn's curators providing tips to their British counterparts on how to correctly smuggle medieval coins about one's person.
Sadly, due to the increasing laziness of Torn's people, the Museum's collection has now dwindled to a mere trickle. So, in an attempt to combat this, item donators will receive 10% more points than they typically would for the duration of World Museum Day on May 18th, with this feature part of a two-pronged approach aimed at boosting the Museum's flagging popularity.
Pictured: A place less popular than the local brothel, race track or city dump.
On Friday, those who provide the museum with an Egyptian Amulet that definitely wasn't stolen while on holiday in Egypt stand to receive 1,000 more points than usual, with this increase equating to around $53,000,000 in Torn City Dollars. Likewise, donators who somehow acquire a set of Quran scripts - presumably through the performance of some sort of cultural hate crime - will take home 100 extra points, which works out at $5,300,000 extra in your pocket.
While the gains for a plushie set or exotic flower collection may be paltry, those in possession of high-value rare items stand to make a large sum of money from this promotional venture, as do those who purchase said items from people who haven't yet read the newspaper.
Pictured: The smug face of a man who just purchased 400 Ganesha sculptures off the item market.
The second promotional campaign being run by the museum consists of a soon-to-be-announced competition called The Exhibitionists. This contest, which will run for a week from Friday 18th, invites the public to generate their own potential museum collections from the everyday items available in Torn City. For example, a compass, sextant, naval cutlass and peg leg could be used to form a maritime exhibit. Alternatively, the leather bullwhip, deputy star, gold nugget and leather trousers may form some kind of wild west attraction.
Entrants are encouraged to be creative in their efforts and make links that are amusing, surprising, clever or a combination of all three. Exhibit ideas both historical and contemporary will be accepted, with entries limited to one per person and a maximum of five individual items. The top three entries as judged by Duke will go on to receive the traditional ribbons and point awards, as well as some special historical prizes yet to be announced.
In the meantime, Torn's people are encouraged to purchase or acquire as many historical artefacts as their arms and cavities can possibly hold, for come Friday the 18th, the price of said items is sure to skyrocket like some sort of rocket flying into the sky.
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