Torn City Times

sugarvalves [1963573] — It's fair to say that if this Tornography had been written a few months ago, the tone would be entirely different to what it is today. Hank has suffered a reversal of fortunes the likes of which has never been seen in Torn. In the space of a month he's gone from Relentless bigwig and newbie-hero to a social pariah at the bottom of the pile, with a current networth of minus $107,707,253,620. But is it right that a man who has given so much to Torn is treated in this way? After all, Hank is responsible for getting many players through those tough early years with his Power Levelling Guide. He has helped to provide this city with generation after generation of wealthy citizens for others to prey on. And, not least of all, he has given us this enchanting image; Whether or not you believe he profited unfairly from the WSSB scandal, Hank clearly deserves more respect from the Torn community for his tireless efforts in the past. Yet the city seems divided on ...

sugarvalves [1963573] — The Tornography feature has been absent from the Torn City Times of late, mostly due to the recent spate of controversies, attacks and general changes to Torn City facilitating a need for coverage of current events. But today, our recurring piece on the city's most notable citizens returns with a bang, thanks to the generous participation of one of Torn's most fearsome women - Collete... ...who is actually a man, with a penis and testicles. "After 2556 days of playing female I've come out as male but I'm keeping the name Collete I earned it." To some, this will come as no surprise, as Collete has already informed her nearest and dearest of her real gender. But others outside of her inner circle will no doubt be shocked by the presence of a throbbing great Y-chromosome within the DNA of Torn's most fearsome matriarch. It was apparent to all that Collete possessed a large set of metaphorical bollocks, but few knew of their literal e...

sugarvalves [1963573] — Torn City is a place where pretty much anything goes. Fancy a killing spree before brunch? Go right ahead. Feel like dropping a dirty bomb on an entire city over a minor quibble at the poker table? Knock yourself out kid. But there's one act which, although tolerated by some, seems to offend more people than any other. Buy mugging - the act of shaking down a trader just moments after paying for a particularly expensive item. This kind of behaviour is not illegal in Torn, but nor is it considered good manners. For the most part incidents of buy mugging go unnoticed by the general population, with only offender and offended knowing exactly what happened. But earlier this month an occurrence of buy mugging went down a little differently than usual. For on this occasion, the case was made announced, investigated, solved and resolved entirely in public. The story began at 16:32 PM on the 3rd of January 2017, when Kaurotuan, a simple shack dweller, was approache...

sugarvalves [1963573] — More half a trillion Torn City Dollars in funds was seized last week from a total of twenty individuals caught up in the WSSB stock scandal, according to a bulletin board post from Torn's Governor, Committee Leader and benevolent dictator Lord Chedburn. The exact total of the monies confiscated currently stands at $573,348,570,794 TCD, and while many will undoubtedly be looking to the Torn City Times to pass comment on the perceived guilt or innocence of the parties involved, the fact is we simply cannot be bothered. The Torn City Times is well aware of the issues which surround the WSSB case, with some believing Chedburn's actions to have overstepped the boundaries of reason, and others feeling justice has been done. But this you already know. Chedburn himself has admitted that some innocent people may have been caught up in this sting, but he has made it abundantly clear that these individuals comprise an acceptable level of casualties. This is also ...

IIIlusionist [253384] — With the details that territories will be released on the 31st of January (God willing), excitement is high. Finally, after months of anticipation (if not years), our fairly lackluster warring system will have a massive update that active players can adapt to and get their teeth sunk into. There was even more excitement when the announcement that the new faction specialization trees would also be released a little earlier - on the 17th of January. Trees! With trees comes the big question - what existing and new specials will be in the new structure? Want a sneak preview? Be warned, if you want the trees to be a surprise, then stop reading here - spoilers ahead! The top half of the tree has your basic faction armories; drugs, boosters, medical, and points. The most expensive upgrade in this section is the laboratory, and to fit your faction with one will mean assigning around 100k respect. Moving down the tree, you have capacity and territories upgrades. To upg...

sugarvalves [1963573] — In a series of dramatic raids which took place over the festive period, several notable Torn citizens were discovered to have been trading Torn City Dollars for external currency - a direct breach of the first rule in Torn's 10 Game Offenses and Punishments. One of the most notable convicted sellers of TCD was Big__Al, who was known mostly for his exploits in responding to a poker dispute with a Dirty Bomb. Big__Al has now been permanently banished from the city due to this severe rule breach, and the exact number of TCD sellers caught in this latest operation is expected to be revealed in the next edition of the Torn City Newsletter. However, when several of those caught buying TCD were only slapped with a seven-day sentence, some citizens - led by the perpetually exasperated Maxheadroom - then sought answers as to why their punishments did not fit the "lengthy ban" mentioned specifically in the rules. So is Torn going soft on Real Money Traders...