Torn City Times

ArttiIsGod [1954421] — Answer our clues or you will die a peasant's death, or maybe a pandemic one. Hello and welcome to the Torn City Times Crossword number 45. Thank you very much for your attention. Let's get down to business, shall we? The answer to the previous crossword was ' Everyday is day, unless it is a night. ' We spread such wisdom with these simple puzzles, please hire us to write your faction's next slogan. The first person to answer correctly was Kuroyukihime [284514] . Our three runner ups were: Mr_Mestopheles [2048355] , WR14 [2254480] and Paramount [662063] . Congratulations! Someone also drew us a nice full crossword that we enjoyed looking at for some time. That person was biosterous [2377874] Such a beautiful hand-writing. Not like a serial killer at all. This week's crossword is below. The answer runs diagonally from the right side at a 60 degree angle to the right, before progressing to the left. Does that make sense? If not, no Dona...

sugarvalves [1963573] — World Tourism Day set to begin at noon on the 26th. Double travel item capacity bonus in effect for 48 hours. Bonus stacks with other capacity boosts. If you're a plushie runner, a flower seller, or a fan of exotic foreign drugs, don't miss out on this weekend's World Tourism Day event, which allows you to return from foreign nations with twice as many souvenirs as usual. And the best part is you won't need any additional lubricant! Pictured: No need to store a plushie in your tushie. World Tourism Day begins midday on Saturday the 26th, and for 48 hours, all passengers returning to Torn will be able to bring back two times as much crap in their luggage as usual. This bonus only applies to players whose flight leaves Torn after 12:00 noon on the 26th and before the same time on the 28th. It doesn't matter when your flight returns to Torn, only that you depart within the 48-hour window. The standard travel capacity for a player coming back ...

sugarvalves [1963573] — Victorious Secret strip off and settle for second after straightforward final fight. Murder Hornets smoked out for third. Drieke breaks competition record. Final gossip roundup of the tournament. Sea Men are the 2020 Elimination champions! The salty sea dogs clinched victory at 6:45am this morning after inflicting 24 hours of straight life losses upon their former allies, Victorious Secret. The final three were determined on Monday when the Karma Farmers were triple-teamed by Sea Men, Victorious Secret, and Murder Hornets. And it was at this point that the final two was also decided, as there was never any realistic prospect of the Dirty Sexy Money alliance being broken up to allow Murder Hornets a chance at victory. That being said, Sea Men and Victorious Secret were both making hits on each other before the Hornets were defeated in an attempt to even up their ticket scores. However, this screenshot from the VS discord shows that a ceasefire was soon agreed...

sugarvalves [1963573] — Seal Team Six clubbed after betraying alliance. Terror Bytes suffer fatal exception error. Karma Farmers enter Nirvana. Hornets allow themselves to be swatted. Read our final Elimination gossip column There are now just three teams remaining in Elimination 2020. Let's waste none of our precious damntime in finding out what happened, who it happened to, and which team is going to win Elimination 2020. FATE IS SEALED When last we checked our six remaining teams were split four to two, with the long-standing alliance of Sea Men and Victorious Secret facing off against Murder Hornets, Karma Farmers, TerrorBytes and Seal Team Six. But that soon changed when ST6 realised they were being clubbed into submission, and David Attenborough was nowhere to be seen. IceBlueFire sent us this graphic which shows just how few Seals were out of the hospital during this incident - their member count was 620 at the time. Bringing the threat of extinction upon the Seals was y...

sugarvalves [1963573] — Peasants oppressed. Pandemic cured. Toothpaste emptied. Vikings slain. Bankers Totalled. Elimination final six revealed, along with all the latest gossip and intrigue with just a few days left to go. We are now down to the final six teams in Elimination 2020. Let's find out who done what, why they gone and done it, and how many sh**ty puns I can fit into one article as we round up the latest happenings in the Elimination Competition. PEASANTS AND PANDEMIC PUNISHED Elimination proceeded as expected after our most recent article, with the Peasants dropping out in the early hours of the 15th. When the poor needed aid, Torn looked away anxiously and whispered "sorry mate, I haven't got any change." But the paupers' defeat was not as simple as one might imagine, according to one of their members, who wanted to clear up the situation regarding their Discord deletion and subsequent early exit. "The person who created it deleted it early, b...