Torn City Times

sugarvalves [1963573] — Summer Tournament set to begin with warmup phase on July 25th. Entry slots and prize pool expanded for biggest ever URT. Stewards and betting assistants required. The schedule for the Summer Ultimate Racing Tournament has been confirmed, with the event set to begin with a series of warmup races starting on Saturday the 25th of July. Our initial four days of testing will be followed by four official qualifying sessions running daily from the 31st to the 3rd, with the tournament proper taking place from the 5th to the 16th of August. The URT is a racing competition which is free to enter for racers of any level. The overall winner of the tournament receives a $1 billion prize, a rare Bugatti Veyron, a Gold Racing Trophy, and the usual prizes and ribbons. Our second and third-placed players receive a rare Audi and a Racing Coin respectively, in addition to the silver and bronze trophies, and cash prizes of $800 million and $650 million. The big news is that this...

sugarvalves [1963573] — If you've got some spare time this weekend, have you considered getting yourself tooled up, entering beast mode, and going out to slaughter your fellow Torn citizens? This weekend the City of Torn celebrates World Population Day, an awareness day which, in the wider world, aims to draw attention to the issues caused by global overpopulation. While most people understand that our unsustainable lifestyles are to blame for our current problems, others have decided it's easier to force people to stop procreating than it is to get them to place their recycling in the right coloured bin. Unfortunately for those who see Children of Men as a utopian fantasy film, human beings are notoriously fond of plowing each other into next Tuesday, with the pleasures of the flesh known to cure many different ailments, including boredom, gamer rage, Shatner's wandering thyroid, and horse misery. However, if one is not careful, this most joyous of acts can sadly resul...

sugarvalves [1963573] — Read our latest confessional column in order to learn how a thief should repent, what despicable lust would drive a father to betray his son, and why you may be unaware of the true nature of your sin. They say let he who is without sin cast the first stone, and yet each and every morning I am able to skim rocks on the lake without restriction, occasionally hitting a duck or two. Maketh of that what you will. I do not profess to have never sinned - the opposite, in fact. Your beloved Pastor Williams has sinned a great deal, which makes me something of an expert in sinnery, and therefore the most capable of passing judgement upon my flock. The Pastor's Response "You have less honour than a piece of s**t" - Alison Goodman There is little I can add to this confession, for it speaks for itself with horrible clarity. To kick a man when he is down is one thing, but to rifle through his pockets, flirt with his wife, and molest the family dog while he l...

sugarvalves [1963573] — Find out which events you need to prepare for, why Xanax might rise again, why people bought temporaries in a panic, and where cans are heading this summer. FORTHCOMING EVENTS July plays host to two event days, with World Population Day taking place from the 10th to the 12th, and World Tiger Day occurring between the 28th and 30th. The former sees players gain double the usual experience while attacking, so we could see a small rise in Xanax and medical items take place because of this event. World Tiger Day allows players to receive five times as much hunting experience, and since this takes place in South Africa, Business Class Tickets will likely experience a price increase as we get closer to the event itself. BCTs have already risen in anticipation, with this trend starting in April. But if last year's data is anything to go by, a second increase will be short-lived, so you'll want to try and price your stock competitively unless you want to be s...

Evaline [2103253] — A Guide to the Mr. and Ms. Torn Competition, and how you can enter this year's event safely during the Coronavirus pandemic. July is here, and with it comes this year's Mr. and Ms. Torn Competition starting on the 5th. For those of you who haven't participated in the competition or are new to the community, this event is all about the three B's: brains, beauty and... well, you'll know soon enough. The premise is simple. All you have to do is submit a personal photo to be rated by your peers before the 20th of July. From the 5th, players spend three weeks rating each other's images out of ten until the 25th, at which point the scoring is halted and the Mr. and Ms. Torn winners are crowned. First-time entrants receive a merit for participating and other prizes are given out to the top three finalists in each category. This year's event brings with it some unique challenges as players attempt to preen themselves amid the limitations of th...

sugarvalves [1963573] — Torn's least popular company receives major profit boost to attract investors. Racing perks removed, replaced with three new attack-focused specials. Torn City's Gas Stations received a welcome boost today with the news that their special perks have been boosted in an attempt to attract more people to the industry. Pyromaniacs, in particular, are encouraged to dust off their charred CVs and hand them in, as this company is now even more firestarter friendly than it was before. Pictured: If Keith Flint were still alive, he'd definitely work in a Gas Station. The first thing employees will notice is that the one and three-star specials, Machinist and Discount Parts, have been completely removed. Whereas Gas Station employees could once exchange job points for racing points and enjoy a 75% discount on all car parts, you will now have to take a job at a Mechanic Shop in order to use these specials. Arsonist, the now obsolete five-star special which us...

Proxima [1879587] — Let's look through the Patch lists for June to see what updates, changes, and fixes have been made by the Developers, and what they mean for you This article covers the most important patch notes published from the 2nd to the 23rd of June. Please note, the updates and bugs documented in this article are worked on by a team of developers. Where a single developer is individually mentioned, it simply reflects who confirmed the report as fixed or complete, and not that they were solely responsible. Added the ability to gain weapon EXP with damaging temporary weapons . After a suggestion from ttyper, weapon experience has now been added to every temporary weapon that deals a damaging hit (Grenade, Throwing Knife, Trout etc). - Fixed weapon name tooltips not appearing on the 'Ammunition for your equipped weapons' panel. MightyGoober noticed that on the Ammo Locker page, a tooltip over the Ammo Icon detailing which of your equipped weapons loaded that ty...

LordofFire [2411517] — After two months of intense racing, the first ever Justice League Tournament came to an end, and its champion is... naaah, you'll have to read the article to find out. Several months ago I received a simple question from Jairyll: “Lord, do you want to help organize a small tournament with me?” This "small" tournament turned into the biggest player-organized racing tournament in Torn history. Over the course of two months, more than 400 racers competed in 80 races set across nine different groups, with over $2 billion in prizes distributed among the winning racers. This competition resulted in over 1,000 messages being sent out by the three-race organizers, so please, Mr Chedburn, can we have group mails now? You can read all about how the championship unfolded via the official Justice League thread here, where you will also notice some outstanding graphics work provided by Indolent . The tournament ended with an exciting championship week full o...