Torn City Times

Spiff-King [384108] — They say it takes a village to raise a child. It also takes a village to smack a giant with a trout. This is the story of how the community helped Torn's strongest player to take a little fishing trip As many of you will know, on August 11 th the new Honor named [Gone Fishing] was released. The requirements for this honor are simple, as to earn it, you merely need to be defeated by someone who makes the last hit upon you with a trout. For most players, this is easily done with the help of a friend or factionmate, but for those at the very top, the patch notes accompanying this honor indicated you may have some difficulty. [HONOR] Added 'Gone Fishing' for being defeated by a Trout (scales in difficulty the bigger the fish you are) Corny puns aside, this note stood true for some of the biggest players in Torn. Our story today is about one such player we all know, and the difficulties he faced in achieving this honor. A player who has the largest Batt...

ArttiIsGod [1954421] — Four-four takes a summer title and finishes in last place... Hello and welcome to the Torn City Times Crossword 44. Our last crossword was exceptionally popular, with lots of new players trying to solve our puzzle for the first time. The answer to Crossword 43 was Trading kidney for something valuable ! The first person to answer correctly was Crannie . Our three randomly selected runner-ups are: tomcatmeowbuddy , Quincey670 , NomadXG . 1st also managed to solve our puzzle fully, and they win some DPs for providing us with this completed crossword: This week's crossword has some worldly wisdom to share within the blue cells running from left to right, top to down. This tightly packed crossword should keep you busy for a couple of hours, or minutes, if you're one of those people who are quick to finish. Wink, wink! BIG CROSSWORD LINK CLUES Across 6. Happy doubling drug 12. Acting company 14. A period of 10 years 15. A Baseball bat 17. Sensual and arous...

sugarvalves [1963573] — Which faction bent the knee to Chain Reaction? Will the Phoenix Rise again? Why can't MightyGoober talk to women? Who spent a billion on bounties? And whose vault did we save from a daring raid? Are you curious as to what's been going on this month but you're too smart to read the forums? Then why not have a read of these short stories from the streets of Torn City the next time you're straining on the can. And remember, we pay Donator Packs to players who slip us some juicy gossip, so if you've got a story to tell, Tell It Today . VAULT THEFT IMMINENT? We faced a moral dilemma at the Torn City Times this week when a player confessed to Pastor Williams that they were about to empty their faction's vault. Confessions are supposed to be anonymous, but in this instance, we decided that the security of a faction was more important, so we outed the bastard to his leaders. We believe confessions should be private, but it's not really a c...

sugarvalves [1963573] — How do you get the Stock Analyst merit? What happened during the blackout of 2007? And when should you delete your faction? Aunty Torn answers all of these and more in her latest advice column. Listen up boys and girls, because Aunty Torn is back with some more advice for you silly young things on matters of the heart, the flesh, and the wallet. And she's even gone back through her old diary to find out what happened thirteen years ago when Torn experienced a mysterious blackout! Read on to find out, as we hear once more from Dear Aunty Torn. Dear Aunty Torn, I recently dove into the world of stock trading. I have all the usual blocks and many piles of stocks just for investment. However, I'm a little frustrated because I see that I haven't achieved the "Stock Analyst" merit and Andyman doesn't have any cool graphs to help me achieve it. I try to "buy and sell shares actively in the stock market" but alas, I don't have ...

VitaGreta [1867016] — Read about some of the best deals ever done in the city, and the worst! Every once in awhile the forums are graced with an extraordinary story of good fortune, almost always told by the benefactor, and often at the expense of another. Cautionary tales of a mistyped number, mistaken identity, or misplaced trust amid a trade are frequent, and before long, these stories pass into Torn legend, destined to be remembered and retold in forum threads for years to come. In this article, I thought I'd revisit some of these tales to see how they compare to one another. I was inspired to do this by the recent incident where Chohivzla sold a pair of Sports Sneakers to a friend for $7bn, despite having an offer of $10bn on the table at the time. A few days later, Chohivzla's "friend" flipped the sneakers for $12bn by selling them to MightyGoober, making a healthy $5bn profit in a matter of days. There are many stories like this of items worth billions which...

sugarvalves [1963573] — Record-breaking 122,045 respect taken from Phoenix Rising after epic raiding battle. Sharkeyfive blamed. Misinformation believed to have played a part in record total. PR owner scammed by temp leader. Phoenix Rising had nearly 2.4 million respect at the beginning of August. Today, that figure stands at just over 2.2 million thanks to a record-breaking raid initiated by The Wolverines earlier this month. At least it would, if Phoenix Rising still existed. Less than 24 hours ago, the Phoenix Rising faction was sold and renamed, with all but a few of its members kicked and its history erased. Their troubles began on the 29th of July, when The Wolverines began raiding PR in an assault that would not stop until the 10th of August. During this time, The Wolverines removed 122,045 respect from their rivals, whereas Phoenix Rising only managed a 9,041 respect reduction in response. At the time, this meant that The Wolverines held the record for the most destructive...

sugarvalves [1963573] — 16th-ranked driver secures title in comprehensive fashion with 15-second lead in final. Full table of prize money and tournament placings revealed. Soybean award winner announced. Bronx has become the latest owner of a brand new Bugatti Veyron after he clinched the URT Summer title with a dominant win at Stone Park on Sunday. Our champion was ranked 16th going into the tournament, and yet he still managed to hold off no fewer than four top ten drivers in the final to finish with a commanding lead of 15 seconds ahead of his nearest competitor. "Unbelievable feeling. Definitely the best achievement in my Torn life. To be able to win against all these elite racers in the final is something special. I was lucky to get through the semis (would have finished 4th if the finish line was a bit further) and it was then when I realised that maybe, just maybe, I have a fighting chance in the final." The lead was exchanged multiple times in the early stages of...

sugarvalves [1963573] — Find out how you can win big this weekend by betting on the URT final, entering one of our open prize races, or by signing up to Prezze's Wreckfest, a new tournament which begins next week! Summer's Ultimate Racing Tournament draws to a close this weekend, and with its conclusion come a series of public races where you, yes you, can win a range of exciting prizes for finishing in random positions. But before we tell you how you can enter and what you can win, here's an update on how the URT has gone so far, and which drivers are in with a chance of winning the much-coveted Bugatti Veyron in Sunday's grand finalé. Thank you to Indolent for creating a fantastic set of graphics for this year's URT, which we've used to illustrate this article. GROUP STAGE The group stage of the URT ended last Sunday, with Group A seeing Ketone, Solenoid and Stormcast progress. Dblcork can be proud of their performance though, as despite being the third-low...